i read a stupid game review of Dungeon Defenders. that pretty much sums up this post.

OK, this is the last thing I'll post about Dungeon Defenders (probably) and then I'll give it a rest. Last night I had a ton of fun with the game. Didn't even realize how late it got until I was told that it was past my bed time or else I would be dead in the water at work! The Monk is an awesome character. I loved his easy combination of ranged and melee and how his weapons let you pick and choose which you want to do more of. We cheated last night so I didn't get to use my auras very much, but they seemed like they could be super handy! I am not high enough level yet to use the one that turns mobs against each other but I'm excited for it.

Anyway, this morning I happened across a review of the game that someone posted on Twitter and I could immediately tell from the title--that it was the "best Tower Defense EVER"--that they had received a review copy of the game from the publisher. Sure enough by the time I got to the end of the review there was the little damning sentence of confirmation at the bottom. Why do I think they weren't being honest in their glowing review? Well, it was barely a review. 3/4 of the article was just describing the game. Then there's a little blurb about something that is wrong with the game but they played it off like it was no big deal after all, and then ended it with a Oh trust us! We promise if you like any type of video game ever, you will like this one more!

First off, the game is a little buggy. Not game ruining, but worth mentioning. More than one of us had issues with it randomly switching us to gamepad enabled mode when there was no gamepad connected to our computer and had to reset the game to get it to bounce back to mouse and keyboard. There are a few other jolts and freezes here and there, but nothing to really write home about so I could probably let those pass. The biggest annoyance for me was that we weren't getting Steam Achievements, but I couldn't say whether that was a game glitch or a Steam glitch.

The art is simplistic but fun. I would like to reiterate again that the Huntress looks like a blow up doll modeled off a cheap whore. I get it. They were making "clever" jokes on RPG characters. Good job Trendy! You noticed that video game women tend to have giant knockers and visible butt cracks! Man, you are so smart. We totally needed that pointed out to us. That was definitely original and clever. Good job. /sarcasm

I would say that this is a challenging Tower Defense game but not the best I've ever played. It's fun to be sure, and the player combat combined with the towers, traps, auras, bumpers, etc. is a hoot. However, this game is only challenging the first time around. After you have a high level character you can just cheat and bring them in, set up their superior defenses and offenses, and then let your lower level characters stand around doing nothing and gain levels. We mostly goofed around and shot at things anyway when the big stuff was put out and dominated everything, but the point stands. Also, I still hate the static cross-hairs, uncontrollable auto-aim, and the worst nonadjustable camera angles a game has ever seen. Those three things nearly ruined the game for me until I relaxed into hack and slash mode and didn't try anymore. 

And seriously, there is not a large RPG element. I wish people would stop saying that. At best, there is a weak RPG element with the combat and the stupid freeze frame by frame story telling between major levels. Oh look! Your base for picking levels is in a tavern. If I throw a tavern into a game does that automatically make it an RPG? Apparently the answer is yes according to some reviewers. 

It is a solid, fun, mostly original as far as I can tell, kooky Tower Defense. I agree that it's a good game that people should play that has a great price point. I just hate seeing all these ridiculous worshipful reviews that don't give you any real reason to want to go grab it and don't mention any of the game's very noticeable flaws or picks one flaw to point out to sound like they're being fair but then write about it like they didn't really think it was a flaw in the first place. 

I don't know. Maybe it has more to do with the writing of the reviews? Maybe they just suck at journalism? I'm not this cynical about all reviews that are glowing for it, there just seems to be a great many that sound incredibly fake mixed in with the few honest ones that actually talk with you about the game rather than copy/paste the publisher's PR release. 

tl;dr I woke up late this morning and read a retarded game review that made me ranty. I want to read a positive review of Dungeon Defenders that doesn't just sound like a publisher hand job.